Fifteen again with Donny and Marie

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During the days of daily school assemblies, – for anyone who doesn”t have a clue what I’m talking about, whilst in the U S at that time the school day used to start with the pledging allegiance to the flag (at least when I attended school there), similarly in UK many of us used to have to commence each day by marching ( literally) into the school hall; bibles clutched in one hand, hymn book in the other to take part in a denominational or non-denominational school assembly. In my school. our assembly consisted of singing a few hymns, reciting the Lord’s Prayer, and listening to school updates and notices. The “lucky“ few of us who did piano lessons would be called upon every month to play the piano in a desperate and bum-clenchingly embarrassing attempt to accompany the hymn singing that morning!! Our bibles (and this is not meant to sound sacrilegious or disrespectful in any way) would serve as the secret repositories for pressed flowers; photos of our latest “crushes”; little girlish notes and scribblings ; clippings and so on. Mine ( which is still full of this original 70`s teen girl stuff) had photos of Donny Osmond and Jay Osmond ( the drummer).

Just a piece of historic context as this was around ahem ********** years ago, and The Osmonds`collectively had already been forming from the age of 5 or younger.

So of course both Marie and Donny have been at the showbiz thing for almost 50 years each, and after a break of 20 years have brought their` Donny and Marie`Vegas show to Toronto for two weeks only so that we Canadians can bask in their fabulousness.

During my walk east along Queen street, I got my first shock in the shape of an ever-increasing swarm of women of a certain age; dressed to the nines and in packs descending upon “The Four Seasons Centre for the Performing Arts`

Seriously! surely these mature creatures couldn`t be going to the same gig as I – yep wise-up girly – the alternate delusional universe you have been inhabiting of late has opened up and spat you out – this is reality, you are probably older than most of the audience.

Second shock of the evening was that both Donny and Marie seemed still to be living in the alternate reality I thought I inhabited – They were on their 50`s, lithe, vibrant, fit looking and leaping (yes LEAPING) around the stage – no evidence of knackered knees on this stage. Both sublime professionals; both recent `Dancing with the Stars contestants ( she a finalist; he a winner – different seasons), and both with bios that took half the show to read. I was witnessing practiced consumate show biz perfection.

Although I thought I`d gone to see Donny Osmond – my childhood dream – it was Marie who stole the show for me…

Slim, and a fabulous advert for the `eat what I eat`nutrisystem diet program; she was still voluptuous – all hair, fringed glittery costumes (a different outfit for every song courtesy of her `dresser`daughter) and sky-high spangled heels. She had an amazing vocal range and a neat comedic repartee with the audience. She necked down a bottle of water in about 2 seconds before turning to confront the audience with the quip` and you thought Mormons couldn`t drink!` She was especially beguiling with some of the minority males in the audience inviting one brave soul on stage to bask up-close and personal in her allure. She sang and smootched with him declaring herself às safe“ to his wife because she was married. She had some difficulties singing an operatic number dedicated to her lately departed son – Even I – ever the cynic – was moved.

Donny – yep he looked fantastic dancing around the stage like someone half his age, but for me Marie stole the show.

I did however get to experience a running high-five” from Donny as he raced past my seat and – I’m embarrassed to admit – my outstretched hand. I would have appreciated this so much more when I was 14. Why can’t we have these momentous experiences when we need them??

Wrapping it up quickly, this was a stupendous slick, professional and unflawed BIG glossy show. Almost too perfect actually but amazing on so many levels; from their collective experience; the montage of family photos and film flashing across the starlight screen behind many of the performances – images that have back-dropped my life and more formative years in particular ( The Osmonds `Crazy Horses`was the first LP I ever bought) and dêspite the by and large retro material, the sheer up to the minute dazzle…….

Way to go